The Princess and the Prince
A Fairy Tale
One upon a time there was a young princess. She was the eldest daughter of the king. And because her father had no son, when she grew up she knew she would become Queen of All the Land.
The Land was one of the greatest in the world even though one of the sports umpires was so mean that his son would not sit on his father's lap. So soon everyone was saying that the son never sits on the Brutish Umpire.
Once the Princess met a young prince. Although he was born in another country, that was no big deal. After all, her great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather was from Germany, and when he had become king he never even bothered to learn English. Besides, the Prince's mother was the daughter of the daughter of the daughter of the Greatest Queen of the Princess's Own Land. The Great Queen had ruled longer than any other Queen or King, and the Princess's own father was the son of the son of the Great Queen. So the Princess and the Prince decided to get married. That makes a lot of sense.
The Princess was very happy particularly since once she became Queen she knew that the Prince would not become King. Instead he became the Queen's Consort which sounds like he hung around with people. He did, but not like it sounds. There is also no truth to the story that the Prince actually required people who wanted to meet him to pay for Consort tickets.
As Queen, the Princess ruled for years and years and then on September 9, 2015, she became the longest ruling monarch in the history of her country, and one of the longest ruling monarchs in the history of the world. She had even ruled longer than her great-great grandmother who was also her great-great-great mother-in-law. Her subjects had great celebrations and stayed late in the pubs.
The only thing that bothered the Princess was that the Prince sometimes would say things that caused great merriment among her subjects. When the Princess wore her crown for the first time, the Prince looked at her and asked, "Where did you get the hat?" Once he had gone to a concert of a famous singer and later asked him, "What do you gargle with? Pebbles?" Then when he was visiting a zoo at a far away country, one of the keepers asked if he wanted to pet one of the furry little animals. He replied, "Oh, no, I might catch some ghastly disease." And when he met a man who said his wife had a more important job than he did, "Yes," the Prince said, "we have that trouble in my family, too."
The Princess finally said, "Oh, shut up, Phillip."
After all, she was the Queen.